“Always we hope someone else has the answer. Some other place will be better, some other time it will all turn out well. This is it. No one else has the answer. No other place will be better, and it has already turned out. At the centre of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.”

~ Lao Tzu

I love this idea and hope it impacts you the same. This is our philosophy when it comes to mentoring couples. Dino and I are not the answer that will solve your marriage problems. The answers are within you. We are there to guide you to uncovering them. We ask the effective questions that will help you discover the solutions inside of you~ and we are dang good at it! It’s a brilliant model that keeps you as the couple in active problem solving, and not a passive participant waiting for us as mentors to “fix you”. You aren’t broken. You need assistance in rediscovering what your spirit already knows.. that you are amazing. You are worthy of love, and to love others profoundly.. And your marriage can mend.

Yes we have fantastic tools to teach you. But at the core of it all~ YOU are the answer in your life. You know who you are. You know what you want. And I’ll add one more, you know how to get it. You just have to be willing to do the work.

Are you ready??

Love and happiness,

Shannon

I’ve been doing some research on Marriage and how it affects a person’s finances, and the studies seem to show the same results, over and over again-  Marriage makes people richer!

Not all marriages, of course, and “richer” is relative. But overall, people who get married and stay married build significantly more wealth than single folks:

• The median net worth of married-couple households in the latest Census Bureau wealth study, conducted in 2002, was $101,975. For single men, median wealth was $23,700. For single women, $20,217.

• A 15-year study of 9,000 people found that during that time, people who married and stayed married built up nearly twice the net worth of people who stayed single. Even when all other factors are held constant — stuff like income and education — just the fact that they were married contributed to a 4% annual rise in these couples’ wealth.

• Wealth declines typically started four years before a divorce was final, and the breakup ultimately reduced the typical person’s net worth by 77% of that of the average single person.

So marriage is far more than a romantic arrangement; it has financial ramifications as well. Those who ignore the business aspects of marriage do so at their own peril, as that divorce statistic shows.

If your finances are greatly impacted by whether you are in a healthy, happy marriage, wouldn’t it make sense to get continual education on the biggest investment in your life?

Just some food for thought that I wanted to share…

To your happiness,

Shannon

PS- I’d suggest plugging into our Business of Marriage 3 day events. We have our finger on the pulse of what’s happening in marriages across the nation. Stay up-to-date on current tools that will catapult your relationship to the next level. Check our website www.thebizofmarriage.com for dates and pricing. What a wise investment for your success!

One of my favorite days of the year is Mother’s Day. It’s not because of the presents, or breakfast in bed, or all the extra attention (which is all fabulous), but it’s the simple gift of a card that makes it memorable. I cherish the homemade, handwritten cards that capture my heart. They are snapshots of this moment in time. I can refer back to them at any time and I can be transported back to that feeling of love and gratitude when I need it the most.

Luckily in our marriage, we’ve naturally formed a tradition of giving each other cards or love letters through out our relationship, and it’s made a meaningful impact on us. These special momentos have created a timeline of significant moments in our life; some mark big occassions, some were written as “just because” reminders of why we love each other.

Each one will be a legacy we leave our children. More importantly, they are a touchstone for Dino and I to refer back to when we need an emotional boost, or when we are feeling nostalgic. They are a great reminder of where we have been, and how deep our relationship has evolved since then. It’s a great slice of our life together.

I cherish the time and thought Dino puts into his love letters. The imperfect spelling, the scratchy handwriting, the funny phrases he uses- they all put a smile on my face, and warm my heart each time I read them. They are the best gift he could ever give me.

Do you agree? How important are personal notes-cards- letters to you?

My Love Letter Challenge:

Take a moment this week to capture your feelings for your spouse on paper.

You could buy a card and jot a heartfelt note inside.

Or use stationary and create an old-fashion love letter.

Stick a post-it note I love you message in their briefcase or purse.

Get creative. Whatever you do will be perfect. The key is to just do something!  The return on your investment will be worth your effort.

Then post your results here. We’d love to hear from you!

Hello world- this is Shannon, Dino’s wife. This is my first official post on the Business of Marriage blog. I’m excited to start sharing more of my insights here.

For my first topic, I thought I’d share something I found when I was browsing the internet today. This list is a great reminder of why we should take the time to connect with our spouses. I love that there’s SO MANY positive benefits to sharing myself with my husband.

The next time your brain starts to give you a list of WHY YOU DON’T have the time, energy, or desire to make love, I suggest you review this powerful list of WHY TO DO IT.

To the success of your marriage,

Shannon

50 Reasons to Make Love

1. To relieve stress.
2. To improve emotional intimacy.
3. To boost your immune system.
4. To burn calories.
5. To improve heart health.
6. To build self esteem.
7. To decrease pain.
8. To improve sleep.
9. To help reduce prostate cancer risk.
10. To strengthen pelvic floor muscles.
11. To increase blood flow in the body.
12. To reduce cravings and fatigue.
13. To connect emotionally, physically and spiritually as husband and wife.
14. To fight aging.
15. To awaken your sexual senses.
16. To say, “I love you” in your spouse’s love language.
17. To experience pure pleasure.
18. To just have fun together, and be more playful.
19. To fulfill each other’s universal need for touch.
20. To reduce vulnerability to temptation.
21. To experience many physiological and psychological health benefits.
22. To help repair and/or rejuvenate the relationship.
23. To experience validation.
24. To become ONE.
25. To affirm that sex is of God.
26. To help you feel more calm and contented (and less irritable).
27. To co-create children. (Remember multiply and replenish the earth…!)
28. To keep the spark alive in marriage.
29. To experience lovemaking’s natural anti-depressant effects.
30. To increase her sexual desire, and better satiate his desire as well (or vice versa)!
31. To experience profound joy and intimacy.
32. To experience a “wholesome recreational activity” as husband and wife.
33. To switch gears from parent or employee to spouse and sweetheart.
34. To help you forget about all your cares for a little while.
35. To nurture love and friendship in marriage.
36. To forgive.
37. To heal wounds in the relationship.
38. To give a “gift” to the one you love. (BTW, this is a great Christmas gift for your honey!)
39. To enjoy “God’s wedding gift to husband and wife.”
40. To get to “know” each other (as defined in the Bible).
41. To cure a headache.
42. To practice and perfect the intricate art of lovemaking.
43. To overcome negative inhibitions and beliefs about sex.
44. To fulfill the human need for intimacy and connection.
45. To awaken, embrace and develop your sexuality.
46. To practice asking for what you want and need sexually.
47. To learn how to give what your spouse wants and needs sexually.
48. To experience the “exultant ecstasy” of lovemaking available to every couple.
49. To develop the “higher faculties and nobler traits” of human existence.
50. To enhance and reinforce marital unity and commitment.

and . . . Just Because! (My husband made me add this one!)

-Laura Brotherson

For more on the benefits of sex listen to Laura on The Marital Intimacy Show episode #052 — “50 Reasons to Make Love”